Tough Girl

A few weeks ago, in deciding when my husband would venture to the West for some needed family time, I thought immediately, "Thanksgiving" and told him that was when he should go.

I thought, "Only 2 and a half days of child care," I thought, "He will be able to enjoy everyone since the convening will happen for sure and he can soak in everyone at the same time," I thought, "Maximize the amount of time," and I thought, "We have those travel points, right? Just do it."

I thought differently than I do right now.

It's like when I was younger. I thought soo (that's right, an extra 'o') differently than I do right now.

The older I get, the more emotionally vulnerable I become. I did not think that was part of growing up.

I was able to handle six weeks of husband-lessness at 24. Why is it that 6 years later, 4 days without his prickly beard and I am tapped out?

It is not the fact that I have 2 kids. They have been wonderful.

It's me.

I need my husband.

I have this compulsion to want to build our unit more and to stay so insular. At 3:45a when I woke this Thanksgiving morning and made my way to the commode for that nightly ritual, I thought, "I would have Thanksgiving with just the 4 of us and no one else."

What kind of daughter would say that? I love my mom. I love my sisters and brothers. We all live within and hour of each other. Who am I?

I have become a wife and a mother. My husband and my kids are what everything is for. I have never needed them like this, but they are who I want to serve. They are who matter most.

And my husband is at the top of my list. Thank goodness he left some of his PJs behind.

Halloween Shopping

I love that my sister finds a way to shop, even on Halloween. She was such a trooper carrying my son's candy bag, my camera, my son's sword, and even my sister's dog. That's love.

(post-picture - nothing was purchased, but things were tried on and brother's wallets were offered)

Evil Mother

Grandma brought an adorable set of outfits for the boys to wear on Easter, and even though it was a little chilly out, I couldn't resist. Look at how much cuter they are dressed the same! I love that they will hate me for this.

Happy Easter

Looking Forward to Pizza

Calvin has acquired a love of pizza. He calls most things he likes to eat "pizza" and even if he knows he's wrong, it is as if he uses it to show affection to only his most favorite meals.

There are only 3 kinds of pizza here in Turkey: Domino's, Papa John's, and Pide (which is not really pizza at all). We ate some pide when we first got here, but haven't had it in a while. We used to eat Domino's before and after vacations. But now we eat Papa John's (mmm...Papa John's).

Just the other day Calvin looked at the fridge and pulled down the Domino's magnet and said, "Pizza Mommy?" - as in, "Can we get some?"

And we are totally getting some. Not Domino's, not Papa John's, and definitely not Pide. We are going to the birthplace of modern pizza (okay - maybe not Naples, but just nearby). We are heading to Italy next Friday and all of us cannot wait to get our hands on some pizza. Some real, good, what Brother's used to serve, PIZZA.

Merry Christmas Coachmen!

The greatest thing to happen to campus has been a live band made up of musically talented colleagues . They have elevated social gatherings from table tennis to a football match. We have really talented singers and guitar players and a few novice and some experienced bongo players (percussionists) that are awesome.

This Christmas they accompanied some of the off-key carol singing and it really brought the spirit in. The music consisted of some traditional tunes (with T.Cal rockin' out to "Silent Night") and ended with the good old "Twelve Days of Christmas" - my part was the 8 maids of milking. It is nice to have a good laugh (the kind you have with good friends) once in a while. We definitely get it less here and it is not because we aren't trying, it is just different.

Santa (our friend Dave Tarbell from CO) came to lojmanlar and all the kids got presents. It was so sweet seeing all of their faces light up.

3 things I loved about Santa: first - T.Cal was in awe and barely moved when his was given his gift, second - Ella and Campbell (two of the last children to get their gifts) were so patient and had priceless looks on their faces when they got their gifts:
and third - Dave is one of the most fit guys on campus but a beard and a red outfit is all you need to be Santa.